Thankful.

I'm so thankful for this little goose, who has both
enriched our lives and created chaos at the same time.

For my husband who, for what ever reason, continues to
love me without abandon. I am so grateful for him,
 his sense of humor, and devotion to our family.

For family that helps us out and supports us when we need it
(which is always!) Words barely do it justice- but everything is
appreciated, from the words of wisdom and supplies of pork roll
to the (constant) babysitting.

For friends, new and old. Thankful to be on this Mama journey
with a few of you, and thankful for the friends who have
been there for support. All the food, hugs, drinks, wisdom,
bubble baths, and listening are so appreciated.

For good wine and food, and great folks to share it with.

For the natural beauty that exists within New York and for all
of my favorite places.

For foamy cappuccinos, morning snuggles,
sequins, lunges, art, dark chocolate, black squirrels,
pugs, massages, and quiet moments.

For love.

Wishing everyone who takes the time to read this
a very Happy Thanksgiving.

Bleeding Hearts Club

I'm convinced that 2015 is the year
of change, a test of strength, adventure, etc. etc.
It's a rough year, not just for me but so many
friends that I talk to say the same.
Everything is moving and shaking.
















The most beautiful part of this is that even
though everyone is fighting their own battle
and finding their own way, we can still relate.
There is something so comforting about that, and it
offers a rare opportunity to create this little village of
support without judgement.

Sometimes clarity finds you amid the chaos, and I do
feel as though I'm slowly finding my way to the
answers to questions that have been plaguing me this year.
Sometimes they aren't the ones that I wanted, but
I'm learning to change perspectives and be more open
to things-or at least trying. That's all we can do right?

So let's all embrace this fast-moving river while
we've got this energy around us. Rarely is there
so much action for so many people. Band together,
find your own bleeding hearts club, and hang on
because it's a wild ride.

All the Time in the World

Petit fudge is currently on his bi-monthly
week vacation to NJ, I managed to get 9 hours
of sleep last night. It's truly amazing what a
good night of sleep can do for your brain.

It's also incredible what you can accomplish
in just 45 minutes without having an infant around.
I managed to do a small yoga routine, make breakfast
and coffee for the husband and I, eat said breakfast
and slowly sip-not gulp- that coffee.  I will leave myself
with enough time to finish this blog, shower,
and get out of the house right on time.

Makes me wonder what the hell I was doing before baby.
How was I ever late? How did I ever feel like there
was not enough time? I know it's all perspective and you
can only work with what you are given, but wow...
I don't think I'll ever be a free-time waster again.

Happy Tuesday, everyone!

Magic Morning

I think that there are two times each day when
magic is very possible.  Sunrise and sunset.
Yesterday I found myself up with the sun and
heading into the city to have breakfast in bed
with a very dear friend.




















The beauty that exists at these magic times
of the day can be overwhelming.




















The breakfast was delicious and the company
was even better. How often do you get to
lounge in bed with a best friend and just
talk about everything?

It helps on so many levels.
Gaining a different perspective,
de-stressing, resetting your mind,
and hopefully helping them to do
the same.




















A bonus of the morning was that I got to
take a bubble bath. Because our tub at home
is a craphole, I take fancy bath opportunities
anywhere I can. I gave a generous pour of  my
treasured Aesop rose bath gel, got the water
as hot as I could stand it, and just sunk in.





















I left the hotel and headed to work,
feeling so refreshed and happy. Inspired
by my friend's positive attitude and ray of light.
I will try to embrace the fact that life doesn't
feel so balanced and enjoy these magic moments
as they happen.

Autumn Brunch

Before baby I tried to have friends over

for seasonal brunches/gatherings once or

twice a year.  I especially loved doing

something in the fall when the cool

breeze starts to roll in and the house

starts to feel extra cozy.  

This year we've been meeting friends

out instead of entertaining.  But next

year I hope to get back into these brunches.

For now all the ideas are living on pinterest, 

feel free to click through for Autumn inspiration.

   

Follow Littlebunny's board Autumn Brunch on Pinterest.

Like Lightning

I think I've stated before that I take it
seriously when things present themselves
to me more than once. Maybe it's nothing
but it's always worth investigating.

Recently The Wild Unknown Tarot deck
has presented itself to me more than once.
I had started to notice it a few weeks ago
and then it showed up more often. Finally
I was in ABC Carpet and Home yesterday
and there it was, staring me in the face.

That was that.

I drew my first card today,
asking what I needed to focus on
today and this came up

Ace of Swords:Truth & Mental Clarity
"Your mind will become
clear, your thoughts precise"

Spot on.

I'm looking forward to getting to know these cards.
The husband is really not a fan of the tarot but I've always
liked it. It's not so much witchcraft as it is finding a
connection with yourself. Reflecting on things
and finding, as the card says, mental clarity.

Lonesome Dove

There are plenty of things that no one tells
you about being a Mom. One of those things
is that you find yourself being painfully lonely.
Yes, your baby is always around, husband,
work folks- whoever. Somehow
it doesn't take away that feeling.

I felt the same when I first moved to NYC
10 years ago (yes, it's really been a full decade).
In a city of millions of people I felt so alone.
That changed of course as I began to carve out
my little place in this  big city,  I made friends,
had different jobs,  volunteered, went out, dated.
All of that helped to create a wonderful little network
of people that often feel more like family than friends.

But this is different, I don't have that kind of time
anymore and it's harder to keep in touch with friends.
Because when I actually do have time to make a phone
call,  I'm too tired or I just don't feel like talking.
Especially if I feel sad or overwhelmed, I can imagine
that no one wants to hear about that in the short time we
have to catch up. But sometimes I just need to get it out,
to just release it-which is what  the blog is for, I guess.

I know that only 6 months into this I've barely
scratched the surface of parenthood and I'm still
finding my way, striving to find any kind of
balance (which, I swear, does not truly exist
in this country- but that's another post altogether)
The whole point of having children is so that
you can spend time together as a family. How
can you do that when both parents work full time
and have to stagger their schedules to be
able to afford childcare? That's not right.

Which is how I find myself in a black hole
sometimes. It feels good when my Mom is here,
to have someone to talk to and laugh with, and I love
Sundays with the husband and fudge.  But the remaining
4 days of the week I feel very much alone. And
it's not the kind of alone time that I want.

This won't be a post with a resolution at the end, because
this is still a puzzle I'm trying to solve.  Motherhood
is an onion- so many layers.  I can feel alone but not sad,
I can love my baby to pieces and feel frustrated with him,
I can feel different every single day, and I do. Sometimes
all it takes is saying (or typing) things to help to clear the air.
So this is me, trying to clear the air.